2009 could be associated with many negative emotion; fear, anxiety, uncertainty, regret etc. This is not all bad because emotions have ‘motivational consequences’. If we view our emotions as a feedback system, we can use the information to change our behaviours or make better choices. Continue Reading »
It is more than a year ago that I walked through the door of the Self Leadership International office for the first time. I was a young graduate of psychology, coming all the way from Romania to learn about training and leadership development in Singapore; with very little idea of what my internship will bring about.
Now, one year later, I can whole heartedly say that it was the greatest learning experience of my life.
I have posted previously about public and professional speaking and this week I was training a group of young professionals in the art of presentation skills.
During the 2-days training, using video feedback, the participants were transformed from nervous to confident and from unstructured to persuasive presenters. Continue Reading »
“Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt. ”
- William Shakespeare, “Measure for Measure”, Act 1 scene 4
Self Confidence is a critical skill for success and as an executive coach I often encounter people who sabotage their success by lack of confidence.
I think it is helpful to realise that confidence is not the belief that everything will turn out well; confidence is an acceptance of the consequences of any situation no matter whether they are good or bad and the belief that you can deal with them.
The self confident individual does not dwell on negative consequences because they don’t fear failure but see it as feedback for further improvement.
With self confidence as part of your self leadership you will not worry what others think of you but focus on the adjustment you need to make to your communication or behaviour to achieve your outcomes.
Using feedback to improve performance is likely to create positive results which in turn reinforce self confidence creating the belief that you will succeed again.
Self confidence should not be mistaken for over confidence or arrogance; such people do not have the self awareness to learn from feedback and have no concern for the input of others or how their actions affect others.
So the frames of mind that create self confidence are:
Do you need to increase your self confidence today?
Can you perform your job/role better than someone has been doing it for 10 years longer than you?
Would you be interested in getting to the top of your game in less time and before the competition?
The secret is to get past the plateau. With most simple tasks we reach our highest level of proficiency after about 50 hours of practice and then our performance skills become automated and we stop learning. This explains why a 20-year-veteran brain surgeon is not likely to be more skilled than a 5-year newbie by virtue of time on the job. Continue Reading »
A key principle of self leadership is the ability to notice and then respond effectively to feedback.
As I write this blog post I am aware of the pain in my wrist from playing tennis. I have only just started to play tennis; I used to play squash and so I am used to flicking my wrist to get the shot. Flicking your wrist in tennis is not the correct technique and doesn’t deliver the required result; in fact, the result is pain. Now I can focus on the pain or I can focus on the message it is giving me – “correct your grip.” Continue Reading »