A couple of yeas ago I was rushing to meet a new client, a CEO who required some coaching; as I was running short of time I chose to miss lunch and go straight to the appointment.
I was greeted at the company by the company’s communications manager who was to show me to the boardroom to meet the CEO. She politely asked me if she could get me anything, perhaps thinking I might need a tea or coffee. My response was, Continue Reading »
When I speak about leadership at a conference or workshop, I often talk about my children, Tasha (3 1/2) and Nathan (22 months). This is for a couple of reasons, firstly and selfishly because I am a proud father, secondly because it builds rapport with the audience and thirdly and most importantly because they are good examples of leadership and influence principles. In this blog post I wanted to share 3 such leadership principles.
Every parent knows that children are great mimics, they watch you like a hawk and duplicate your behaviour. This can be amusing, as when Tasha first started painting her nails after watching my wife or Nathan picking up my tennis racket and saying, “like daddy.” The dark side of this modeling is when children mimic the aggressive behaviour of adults, which was demonstrated by Dr. Albert Bandura with the Bobo Doll experiment and is evidenced in war torn areas of the world where children carry weapons.
Adults to0 model behaviour which is why the leaders of any team or organisation must “walk the talk”, they must be the model for the behaviours they wish to see duplicated. Talk is cheap – action is real.
Both Tasha and Nathan like to clap themselves when they do something right and they both beam when Zurina and I give them praise. As a leadership consultant I know how important it is that I continue to praise even moderately good performance as research by Dr Ethna Reid shows that teachers who get the best results, validate regularly. Successful teachers also alternate between teaching and questioning (testing) for comprehension.
In leadership and management in a hectic paced world it is all too easy to criticise poor performance and to tell rather than ask. In our leadership for managers program, we emphasise and rehearse the arts of validation and asking good questions.
Children love stories and interpret our cultural moral code from those stories. Tasha knows who are the good princesses (coutesy of Disney) and who is the evil queen, Nathan is learning from Thomas the Tank Engine that when you break the rules you go off the rails, he even exclaims very loudly “oh no!” when this happens.
Effective leaders also tell stories that let their followers know what the vision and culture of the organisation is. These stories get retold and strongly influence the behaviour of the team or workforce. When I was teaching coaching skills at Singapore Airlines I noticed how they regularly used stories of exemplary customer service to validate and reinforce the behaviour of going the extra mile service (GEMS).
Perhaps you have other Leadership Principles you have learned from children – feel free to share.
Executive Coaching has come of age, and is now viewed as an effective way of developing leaders.
I was recently asked to contribute to a book on executive coaching by Dr Susie Linder-Pelz who wanted me to share my perspectives on Executive Coaching in Singapore and Asia. To get the full scoop you will have to buy the book but here are a few things that might interest HR professionals or those looking to engage an executive coach. Continue Reading »
Every executive knows that they must have a vision and mission statement but in times of crisis these important documents can be forgotten.
It is a bit like if you were in a boat and have set your course, but the boat springs a leak and you spend your whole time bailing water and have no time to steer.
William Bridges created a model of change and transition that is highly relevant in today’s financial readjustment. Continue Reading »
Has it ever happened to you that you put off doing a difficult task? Or that you postponed taking an important decision until you would feel more prepared to take it?
Well, if the answer is yes to any of the two questions, you have probably fallen in the same trap so many people fall every day…the trap of Procrastination! Continue Reading »
Listen to a Podcast on the the Power of Influence.
Have you ever wondered why some people get what they want and others don’t?
Can I make a suggestion?
Remember a time when you really wanted something; something you couldn’t have right away but something you would have to wait for, you pictured it in your head, you imagined what it would feel like to possess it and you could feel the pull.
Communication skills are the glue that holds together relationships and the oil that lubricates business and sales.
Good communication skills are essential to lead yourself and influence others. Poor communication causes pain, conflict, loss of productivity and profit.
Listen to a podcast on Communication Skills. Continue Reading »
Is their a difference between leadership and management? Can managers lead and can leaders manage?
These are perennial questions in the field of leadership development and the answers vary depending on who you talk to.
The concept of a leadership pipeline is that as we start supervising/managing we will be more transactional (performance management) and as we move up through the organisation we will become more transformational (visionary/inspiring). Continue Reading »
Confidence is a key success factor for modern managers and leaders and yet many lack confidence in the following areas:
With the way today’s organisations are structured you probably work as part of team, even if it is a virtual one. Working in a team means getting work done with, through, and for others – and the thing about other people, is that they are different! It is this difference that makes team work both exciting and frustrating.
An important realisation when working in a team is that the way you perceive and respond to the world (your personality) is NOT the “Right Way” or “The Only Way” to do things. This realisation reduces our frustration and opens us to the possibility of collaboration rather than compromise.
The team work cycle highlights the need for different personalities. Continue Reading »